Tyler seemed to watch as Vince shuffled around the bathroom, reorganizing the mess that Tyler had left behind. He didn’t blame Tyler for it, he couldn’t help it. Tyler stood at the entrance to the bathroom, hand resting on the doorframe. His eyes followed Vince as he moved around, making quite a bit of noise.
“Why are you just standing there?” Vince asked, casting a glance over his shoulder.
“You haven’t told me anything to do,” Tyler responded, as Vince set their toothbrushes in the holder.
“Oh, right. Just go sit down, on the bed. I need to find your tie.” He pushed past Tyler as the other started to move, making a beeline for the closet. Tyler located the bed and sat, kicking his legs ever so slightly. This bed was taller than the one they used to have, and it was rather amusing.
“You’re always so fussy,” Tyler commented. “So worried about everything.”
“Someone has to be. Maybe that’s why we’re together.” Tyler could hear the bittersweet flavor of his words. There was no pity, but he could tell Vince wished he wasn’t the only one pulling all the weight.
“Where’d you put your tie?” Vince called from the depths of the closet. Tyler shrugged, but then realized Vince couldn’t see him.
“I don’t know. You probably moved it.” Vince emerged at this with a deep sigh, holding several ties in his hand. Tyler turned to him, but didn’t focus on the ties. Or anything, really.
“I can’t find it. We’ll just have to use one we already have.” Vince wasn’t even full dressed yet. He had his pants and shirt on, but it wasn’t buttoned, and his socks didn’t match. Tyler would have laughed if he knew. He was fully dressed, save for his jacket, tie, and top button. He had to wait for Vince to tie his tie, since he didn’t know how to.
“Which one do you want to wear?” Vince asked absently, looking at the three ties. One was red, another was green with blue stripes, and the third was orange with yellow dots.
“I don’t care,” Tyler responded. “I don’t know what they look like.”
Vince suddenly looked up, realization dawning on his face. “Oh, shit, I’m sorry. I forgot you were… God, this is, like, the third time today…”
“It’s alright! Don’t worry about it.” Tyler smiled; he thought it was kind of funny when Vince forgot he was blind. He imagined he made the funniest face, something like a cross between a kicked puppy and a scandalized housewife. When Vince said nothing, Tyler prompted, “Really, you know I don’t care when you forget.”
“Alright,” Vince conceded. “Do you want me to describe the ties?”
“I honestly don’t care. I can’t see what I look like, so what does it matter?” Tyler shrugged once again, smiling easily. Vince was not amused.
“It does matter! You have to look nice. I wish we hadn’t lost your purple tie, it looked so good with your skin.” Vince compared the three ties, holding them up to Tyler’s face, making split-second decisions. Tyler didn’t know he was doing it, but he knew something silly was going on.
“Why do I have to look nice? Why can’t I look… comfortable?” His shirt was just a little too tight, and his pants were itchy. He would much rather be wearing a t-shirt and his favorite cargo pants, but Vince said that was unsuitable attire for a wedding.
“Because then we won’t match,” Vince said, stubbornly. He liked order and organization. Tyler appreciated this about him, but often wondered why he bothered.
“How do I know we don’t?” Tyler insisted. “How do I know we do?” He didn’t even know what Vince looked like. Why should he care what they were wearing?
Vince didn’t say anything. An slight shift of balance on the bed next to Tyler indicated to him that Vince had sat down. Tyler’s hand slid across the bedspread, searching for Vince’s. He found it, placing his on top.
“I didn’t know you felt so strongly about it,” Vince murmured, and from how distant his voice sounded, he wasn’t looking at Tyler. He reached up and located Vince’s face, turning it to face him.
“I just don’t understand. Why is it so important? Why do we have to look good all the time? I mean, I understand not being a slob and taking care of our appearance, but… Why does it have to look good?”
“I don’t know,” Vince said. “I just want us to look respectable. With how we are, people already have these notions in their heads about what we act like and how we look. And with you being blind, the notions are doubled. I want people to have better expectations of you, because you’re so much more than your disability.”
Tyler mulled over this for a moment. His eyes fell to the ground, though he wasn’t quite sure that’s what he was looking at. “I don’t care what they expect of me,” he said slowly, his hand dropping from Vince’s face. “If they expect something less than what I can give, then that’s their fault. They’ll feel like an idiot when I exceed their expectations, and even mine, ‘cause you know I hold myself to a higher expectation than anyone else.”
Vince found Tyler’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “You’re… you’re right. I’m sorry for trying to control you. I just want you to be happy.”
“You’re not controlling me. And I am happy! I’ve got you, haven’t I?” He leaned forward and attempted to place a kiss on Vince’s lips, but was a little far right and ended up on his cheek. Close enough.
“Yes, you have got me,” Vince mumbled, smiling. “However, you still need to pick a tie.”
“Can I pick one based on how they feel?”
Vince paused a moment. “I don’t see why not.” He placed the ties on the bed, and handed them to Tyler one by one, letting him feel the texture on his hands and face. He was a little crushed when Tyler rejected the one that complimented his (too scratchy), but he didn’t say anything.
Tyler ended up picking a gaudy, bright orange tie with yellow spots, because it felt like silk. Vince tied it for him, knotting it perfectly and settling it on his chest.
“How do I look?” Tyler asked, jokingly. He didn’t know that Vince had to stifle a small whimper; it really pained him how Tyler could never see what he looked like.
“You look spectacular,” Vince said, genuinely, endearingly. Tyler smiled, giving Vince the American Sign Language sign for ‘I love you.’
“Thank you. Now, uh, don’t you need to finish getting ready? Claire’s wedding is in thirty minutes, I think…” He was going off of what Vince said roughly an hour ago. There was the sound of skin hitting skin; Vince’s palm against his forehead.
“Aw, crap, you’re right. I still have to get my shoes, and jacket and tie, and, god, I’m not even wearing the same socks! God, how could I-”
“Vince.” Tyler took a few steps forward, grabbing him by the arm. “I think you look fine.”
Another moment’s pause.“Very funny.”
“Why are you just standing there?” Vince asked, casting a glance over his shoulder.
“You haven’t told me anything to do,” Tyler responded, as Vince set their toothbrushes in the holder.
“Oh, right. Just go sit down, on the bed. I need to find your tie.” He pushed past Tyler as the other started to move, making a beeline for the closet. Tyler located the bed and sat, kicking his legs ever so slightly. This bed was taller than the one they used to have, and it was rather amusing.
“You’re always so fussy,” Tyler commented. “So worried about everything.”
“Someone has to be. Maybe that’s why we’re together.” Tyler could hear the bittersweet flavor of his words. There was no pity, but he could tell Vince wished he wasn’t the only one pulling all the weight.
“Where’d you put your tie?” Vince called from the depths of the closet. Tyler shrugged, but then realized Vince couldn’t see him.
“I don’t know. You probably moved it.” Vince emerged at this with a deep sigh, holding several ties in his hand. Tyler turned to him, but didn’t focus on the ties. Or anything, really.
“I can’t find it. We’ll just have to use one we already have.” Vince wasn’t even full dressed yet. He had his pants and shirt on, but it wasn’t buttoned, and his socks didn’t match. Tyler would have laughed if he knew. He was fully dressed, save for his jacket, tie, and top button. He had to wait for Vince to tie his tie, since he didn’t know how to.
“Which one do you want to wear?” Vince asked absently, looking at the three ties. One was red, another was green with blue stripes, and the third was orange with yellow dots.
“I don’t care,” Tyler responded. “I don’t know what they look like.”
Vince suddenly looked up, realization dawning on his face. “Oh, shit, I’m sorry. I forgot you were… God, this is, like, the third time today…”
“It’s alright! Don’t worry about it.” Tyler smiled; he thought it was kind of funny when Vince forgot he was blind. He imagined he made the funniest face, something like a cross between a kicked puppy and a scandalized housewife. When Vince said nothing, Tyler prompted, “Really, you know I don’t care when you forget.”
“Alright,” Vince conceded. “Do you want me to describe the ties?”
“I honestly don’t care. I can’t see what I look like, so what does it matter?” Tyler shrugged once again, smiling easily. Vince was not amused.
“It does matter! You have to look nice. I wish we hadn’t lost your purple tie, it looked so good with your skin.” Vince compared the three ties, holding them up to Tyler’s face, making split-second decisions. Tyler didn’t know he was doing it, but he knew something silly was going on.
“Why do I have to look nice? Why can’t I look… comfortable?” His shirt was just a little too tight, and his pants were itchy. He would much rather be wearing a t-shirt and his favorite cargo pants, but Vince said that was unsuitable attire for a wedding.
“Because then we won’t match,” Vince said, stubbornly. He liked order and organization. Tyler appreciated this about him, but often wondered why he bothered.
“How do I know we don’t?” Tyler insisted. “How do I know we do?” He didn’t even know what Vince looked like. Why should he care what they were wearing?
Vince didn’t say anything. An slight shift of balance on the bed next to Tyler indicated to him that Vince had sat down. Tyler’s hand slid across the bedspread, searching for Vince’s. He found it, placing his on top.
“I didn’t know you felt so strongly about it,” Vince murmured, and from how distant his voice sounded, he wasn’t looking at Tyler. He reached up and located Vince’s face, turning it to face him.
“I just don’t understand. Why is it so important? Why do we have to look good all the time? I mean, I understand not being a slob and taking care of our appearance, but… Why does it have to look good?”
“I don’t know,” Vince said. “I just want us to look respectable. With how we are, people already have these notions in their heads about what we act like and how we look. And with you being blind, the notions are doubled. I want people to have better expectations of you, because you’re so much more than your disability.”
Tyler mulled over this for a moment. His eyes fell to the ground, though he wasn’t quite sure that’s what he was looking at. “I don’t care what they expect of me,” he said slowly, his hand dropping from Vince’s face. “If they expect something less than what I can give, then that’s their fault. They’ll feel like an idiot when I exceed their expectations, and even mine, ‘cause you know I hold myself to a higher expectation than anyone else.”
Vince found Tyler’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “You’re… you’re right. I’m sorry for trying to control you. I just want you to be happy.”
“You’re not controlling me. And I am happy! I’ve got you, haven’t I?” He leaned forward and attempted to place a kiss on Vince’s lips, but was a little far right and ended up on his cheek. Close enough.
“Yes, you have got me,” Vince mumbled, smiling. “However, you still need to pick a tie.”
“Can I pick one based on how they feel?”
Vince paused a moment. “I don’t see why not.” He placed the ties on the bed, and handed them to Tyler one by one, letting him feel the texture on his hands and face. He was a little crushed when Tyler rejected the one that complimented his (too scratchy), but he didn’t say anything.
Tyler ended up picking a gaudy, bright orange tie with yellow spots, because it felt like silk. Vince tied it for him, knotting it perfectly and settling it on his chest.
“How do I look?” Tyler asked, jokingly. He didn’t know that Vince had to stifle a small whimper; it really pained him how Tyler could never see what he looked like.
“You look spectacular,” Vince said, genuinely, endearingly. Tyler smiled, giving Vince the American Sign Language sign for ‘I love you.’
“Thank you. Now, uh, don’t you need to finish getting ready? Claire’s wedding is in thirty minutes, I think…” He was going off of what Vince said roughly an hour ago. There was the sound of skin hitting skin; Vince’s palm against his forehead.
“Aw, crap, you’re right. I still have to get my shoes, and jacket and tie, and, god, I’m not even wearing the same socks! God, how could I-”
“Vince.” Tyler took a few steps forward, grabbing him by the arm. “I think you look fine.”
Another moment’s pause.“Very funny.”
Thanks for sharing!