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The Worst... I mean best soldier of America, Mr John!

by DetectiveCatTail

DetectiveCatTail Hey hi hello, So i just came on this site, saw i could make lil' stories or somethin' so i thought... *Comedy* BTW i am not the best at these things
So, Ya know. There is this one Soldier. Mr John. Who is just known for being... Not the smartest... I'ma tell u some of hes storys.

So, Mr john, Casaully just Waitin' for the next attack on... People... So he's just sittin' on hes bed looking at hes phone and he gets a message ''Attention, There is a spy in our base''. Finally, Thought john. So he starts thinking. Who can this spy by? Until. Snap, a light bulb above hes head was activated. ''I've got it! The vice president!'' Oh yes, i forgot to tell, the vice president, He came to look at the army. (This couldnt go wrong ANY way). So he grabs a string o' rope and walks to the cafetaria. Ties the string around a chair, and a pole. Then, Because he is Mr john, He had to test this, But how? Well its pretty obvious if you think about it, He walks over it!. BAM hes nose was broken. So... He waits, and waits, and waits, (while holding some ice against hes nose the entire time btw) Until FINALLY, The vice president is here. He waits for him to fall and... It fails... ''Dangit, How could he have seen thru my trap, by choosing one of the other 57 ways to walk?!''. So he grabs a lil' bag and walks to the vice president. Puts it over hes head, and throws the ice cubes at the general who was behind him. ''You're comin' with me spy'' And he walks him to the interrogation room ''OKAY SPY YOU'RE GONE TELL ME WHAT U KNOW'' Mr john says with a voice that sounded like mr beans, but then louder. ''Uhm, maybe you should let me sit down first?'' The vice president says. Dangit, hes one tough shell to crack Mr john thinks. But i've been prepared for this Mr john thinks with a grin, And he grabs a nutcracker, Puts the vice presidents nose in it. ''OKAY, If you're such hard nut to crack, then i have the right tool'' (As you may have read, Mr joh isnt the smartest) ''YOUCH, EY EY STOP!'' The vice president says. ''IM NOT A SPY!'' Mr john looks at the bag ''Oh yeah? Prove it to me!'' And the takes the bag off the vice presidents head. The vice president grabs a ID card and shows it. Mr john looks at it and says ''Thats not real proof! You're clearly the spy! I'll take you're mask off to proof it!'' And mr john sticks hes two fingers in the nose of the vice presidents, and tries to pull 'The mask' Off (Fun fact, there was no mask... GASP, PLOTTWIST!). ''Wait... You're really the vice president'' Mr john says. Just when he says that the general walks into the room with other officers, Looking annoyed at what he was seeing. ''MR JOHN, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING'' Mr john looks at him, then says ''Capturing the spy''...

(So, thats it, Hope you enjoyed it, im not the best at it yet, but i do want to continue doing this as it was fun making this! Cya and have a nice day!)