The Story

There was a boy named David. He lived an average life. One day...."Who's there?!"...he was chosen by the Creators.."Stop talking about creators. I'm an atheist."...Shut up this is my story. The Creators chose him to save the Universe from a darkness that will consume the Universe.."You know it would be cool if I was the bad guy instead.".. Not in my story. David trained in the way of the sword. He mastered.."Can I get a bazooka. Swords are so boring."..I control everything, I can even do this. David soon developed stomach cancer and would have constant diarrhea and vomiting. "Ahh *vomits**fart* Make it stop." David found the cure to cancer and used it to cure his cancer. "Fine, I'll use your stupid sword." David mastered how to wield a sword. "Writer dude, what's the setting?" If you'd stay quiet, I would've told you already.."Can you like set me in space." Yep, I can. David was now in space. "*gasping**choking*" David was now on Earth."I almost died!" You wouldn't have because I didn't say so. "But I still felt it!" So? "Whatever. Can you give me a cooler name, like Blastkillerboi." No, your name is David."Can I fight something not cliche? Darkness is stupid. Can I fight like an evil intergalactic tyrant instead?" No, that's not original. "Robots enslaving the human race." No. "Monkeys taking over the planet." No. "Got it! Can I fight a rebellious human colony from the edge of our galaxy?" No, you can fight the darkness. "You know I can just get my flashlight to fix this darkness thing?" David's flashlight's batteries died. "Now how do you expect me to fight the darkness?" With your sword. "That's dumb because last time I checked swords can't hit the dark." Nevermind, you can just die. David died a horrible slow and painful death. His family never came to his funeral. No one came. The End.