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10 Episodes: Episode 2

by E.K.A.N.S.

E.K.A.N.S. Previously, Seb got kicked out of his house for breaking too many windows with his awful voice set off on a journey through the Kalos region. This episode, he reveals his talents as a Pokémon trainer.
"How?! How did someone who only picked up battling a few weeks ago manage to defeat my dad's ultimate Pokémon?!" screamed a Rich Boy, his expensive clothes ruffled and his fragile ego shattered. While his tightly clenched teeth were impossible to pull apart, the seal of his leather wallet was far looser. He snapped the button open and disdainfully threw a wad of cash at Seb's feet.

"Is he a Fisherman or something? Dude, I think we might've killed his dad's lucky Magikarp," Gabe remarked caustically.

"Wait..." questioned an oblivious Seb, gathering the bills and his thoughts. "If his dad's a Fisherman, then how come he's so rich?"

"My mom is the rich one, you idiots! And my dad isn't a Fisherman! He's a Ruin Maniac!" the Rich Boy interrupted, his head cast down and tears welling in his eyes as he confessed. "Because... he's a gold digger."

Sebastiano had turned the immaculately dressed kid into a filthy mop and wiped the floor with him, but now he just felt bad. He wanted to give the guy some advice, tell him not to give up, go catch stronger Pokémon, or pick himself up by his bootstraps... if entitled rich people did that sort of thing.

"Seb, if you're thinking of telling him to go catch stronger Pokémon, he can't. You killed them all when you were out practicing your singing in the woods," Gabe reminded him. "For fuck's sake, please stick to battling. I've watched a lot of bouts on TV and I can say with utmost certainty that you're one of the greatest talents I've ever seen. We've only just begun and have already destroyed the trainers on this route, no sweat."

"WELL. Why don't YOU become a famous pop idol? You're a well-bred, hyperintelligent talking Ralts who can also SING!" Seb rejoined. "And don't curse! We're only 10 years old! Didn't your mother ever teach you not to say bad words?!"

"My mother was a Ditto in the Day Care. In other words, a prostitute. So no," the Pokémon replied. "And you're in no position to talk about family values. Your dad literally disowned you 'cause you can't sing."

The Rich Boy was standing there awkwardly at this point, watching the pair bicker. It was as if everyone else were merely an obstacle standing in the way of a bitter rivalry.

"Hey, uh..." he interjected. "So I guess we all have troubled family situations, don't we?"
  1. kyuukestu
    Jul 27, 2020
  2. E.K.A.N.S.
    @kyuukestu You read it correctly. I'd have it be the girl but what boy fights with their mom's ultimate Pokémon? :D
    Jul 27, 2020
  3. kyuukestu
    Because the gold-digger is stereotypically the girl, but you had it be the guy; subverted expectations, with the father being a Ruin Maniac giving the impression that gold-digger was literal.

    So it was a two-way pun, or that's how I read it. Gold Digger was both literal and figurative.
    Jul 27, 2020
  4. E.K.A.N.S.
    Jul 27, 2020
    SageNeb and kyuukestu like this.
  5. kyuukestu
    The gold-digger bit was both a clever pun and an excellent subversion, kudos!
    Jul 27, 2020