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I can present a new character concept if you wish. Even without coming up with a new one I already have Mai's brother in my head. Believe me he is vastly different than his sister. If you would like to see that portrayal then I can switch gears.
Absolutely not! :D
I must have sounded a lot harsher than I intended if it seemed like I was dissatisfied with Mai-Ling as a character. It is actually quite the opposite, I really like her design and want to see this mouse-by-day-giant-by-night, this Spriggan, work. The concept is awesome, I only found the way it is currently being represented lacking. It bothered me all the more because I like Mai-Ling so much.
So no, don't go changing or dismissing the character. If you like to challenge yourself then find a way to present her properly, and honestly you're on the right track, just take a breath and a step back, and take your time showing us what she's like.
-

Honestly Mai-Ling is an experiment for me. I have not played s character with such self esteem issues in a very long time. As a role player I try to challenge myself constantly to play very diverse character roles theives, artist, computer geniuses, fighters, doctors, etc. There are a few things I tend to avoid, low self esteem and mentally weak characters is one of them.
Sorry if I sound snobby but I really can't help myself. :p
It's a good thing you said 'diverse character roles', because everything being listed after is merely a different skill-set, a change of clothes if you will, and not at all traits that would make a character different. And with character in this context I mean the personality, the core, the way of thinking.

I feel a need to say this because way too many people seem to think that playing a Mage one time and a Warrior the next means they are playing different characters. Fortunately the nature of a character often changes slightly to better fit this new role, but that is usually just by accident. No, really playing a different character is when you take one with the same skills and capabilities and have that one feel like a completely different person.
 
You have seen the diverse selection of personalities in my Dark Tournament npcs I think you can guess I play each "job or class" with a different personality.
 
You have seen the diverse selection of personalities in my Dark Tournament npcs I think you can guess I play each "job or class" with a different personality.
Hmm, somewhat :?
But this really isn't the discussion I wanted to get into here and now. Please keep Mai-Ling. I really want to see more of her, all of her, and how she interacts with others... Or more likely, goes to great lengths to avoid interacting with others. :p
 
Alright then I will just adapt my writing style with her to using much less inner thoughts than I normally do for characters.
Well, we're not saying you should use much less inner thoughts, just... Inner thoughts that are less of a self-loathing mind slave type character, which Mai-Ling is not. Her inner thoughts could be more light and innocent, as she is a shy and sweet girl deep down, such as

'My goodness, the Lady seems especially intimidating today...' And then coupled with her lowering herself even further to the floor upon the countess' presence, which would have been able to incorporate her lack of self esteem without all those admittedly repetitive thoughts.

This is just my suggestion though. We still want to see more of Mai, so please don't scrap her.
 
Correct me if i'm wrong, but I sort of got the impression that Trini and her 'mother' were still outside of Suimera and looking at it from a distance. Perhaps you should let this particular theft slide and focus on getting your girls into the city first?
Oh, if that's the case maybe stating it in RP would be way more practical now I have posted the bio already. Thanks for your advices!

And, about the bag thing, I serously need to think twice before writing. @Chrocey do you have any character or event you wanted to introduce with the bag event or would it be okay if I made a post about Trini stealing it?

I wouldn't be bothered if Trini had stolen it. We might run into a bit of a timeframe issue, though, since that happened a few replies back. Personally, I think Ny might have a point in letting it be for the time being, unless you are SUPER wanting Trini to steal it, then we can figure something out.
 
Alright then I will just adapt my writing style with her to using much less inner thoughts than I normally do for characters.
As Pen already mentioned, don't go reducing the amount of thought the character has because especially with timid character this is your main tool in portraying your character's personality. If anything I'd say more is better.

The only thing I suggest cutting back on is those negative descriptors in every sentence. She can just have a negative thought written like;

'I can never stand on equal ground with someone like her, I am just not as pretty as she is,' Mai-Ling thought to herself.

instead of;

'My worthless self can never stand on equal ground with someone so much better like her. The ugly, cursed blight that I am is just not as pretty as she is,' the self-loathing Greninja thought to herself negatively.

So yeah, don't go changing the amount of mental dialogue, or even the direction of it. Just take more care in how you present it. When a thought is a negative one we'll understand, so there is no need to lay it on so thickly at every opportunity. That's really all there is too it. Other than that you're got a great concept and a solid writing style, so keep it up.
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Jake Acker, I just want to say how impressed and pleased I am with the world building you are doing. The way you put the guard structure there and made it clear that the people would know where to go. The fact that Wilhelm checks in there to get his gear, and the casual banter that makes the place feel alive and comfortable. Great job, well done. :)
 
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I so hope I don't wake up tomorrow, reread my post, then cringe xD I always feel like putting songs into story is treading the borderline of sappy.
It was a great entry, don't you worry about that. But yeah I do agree with the inclusion of song lyrics. I am never quite sure what to do or how to read them whenever I encounter them in literature. In most cases I just end up reading it like a poem, just to make sure I'm not missing any important content, but usually I find myself wishing that the song was simply described rather than scripted, if you know what I mean.
 
So for my next post im hoping to interact with one or more of you guys, a task that shouldn't be too hard considering Wilhelm's occupation. So if anybody is up for it just give me a shout! and if not, that's perfectly okay and I understand entirely :)
 
So for my next post im hoping to interact with one or more of you guys, a task that shouldn't be too hard considering Wilhelm's occupation. So if anybody is up for it just give me a shout! and if not, that's perfectly okay and I understand entirely :)
Well, since Diana, Ajani, and Gerald (soon to be joined by Alora as well) have plenty of interactions amongst themselves, I'd recommend you have Wilhelm interact with Trini (get swindled by her perhaps), or he could meet Opal who is in need of finding a merchant, or perhaps even Allen? Surely a guard would get suspicious of a Ghost type with a stand outside of the west side.

I would've loved to have Cassie run into Wilhelm actually (outside of her 'work hours' she's just known as Ms. De L'allee, a heart breaker with a spotty pas. Residents of the west side would know her to be a cunning pickpocket in her early years, and guards would only hear of her but not be able to catch or get a good look at her, but after taking a leave from the house people assumed the turned in her ways. They do know she is making money somehow but aren't quite sure what. There are plenty of unfavorable rumors about this, however. I'm making it so that it's kind of like a super hero/villain situation where they currently know a theft is going on, but don't really have a clue on who it is that's committing them) and have her flirt with him some, but Que is desperately isolated, and I was planning on using her for him.
 
So for my next post im hoping to interact with one or more of you guys, a task that shouldn't be too hard considering Wilhelm's occupation. So if anybody is up for it just give me a shout! and if not, that's perfectly okay and I understand entirely :)
Wilhelm would run into Alora who's currently traveling in and out of Delitown and probably does not look like she belongs there. ;)
 
Wilhelm would run into Alora who's currently traveling in and out of Delitown and probably does not look like she belongs there. ;)
Now that sounds like a decent plan, something a guard would do automatically :)
And Pen later on I would love to have Wilhelm interact with Cassie, it would be rather amusing to me that he wouldn't know who he was really talking with XD
 
No one's going to say it? Alright. But with all the raving about showing, not telling that's occurred thus far, I was sure that someone would point out how the last few paragraphs of Chrocey's post are a perfect example. There wasn't a single "she is" or similar bland writing tools, and there was plenty of good diction and especially verb choice to characterize who these two new characters really are and how they move. I enjoyed the song's inclusion, as songs can be incredibly powerful tools in writing despite the risk of awkward reading, which was helped by the few sentences of description. You get a cookie, Chrocey.

It looks like our Ekans turned Arbok is going on get into a very hot mess very soon.
 
No one's going to say it? Alright. But with all the raving about showing, not telling that's occurred thus far, I was sure that someone would point out how the last few paragraphs of Chrocey's post are a perfect example. There wasn't a single "she is" or similar bland writing tools, and there was plenty of good diction and especially verb choice to characterize who these two new characters really are and how they move. I enjoyed the song's inclusion, as songs can be incredibly powerful tools in writing despite the risk of awkward reading, which was helped by the few sentences of description. You get a cookie, Chrocey.

It looks like our Ekans turned Arbok is going on get into a very hot mess very soon.

Thanks n~n that means a lot. I'm glad you enjoyed it! I spent like a day or two trying to type all of it, then last night I was like "I need a scene introducing Diana's sisters", and latched that part onto the end xD

I'm happy it was well received!

*Noms on cookie*
 
Thanks n~n that means a lot. I'm glad you enjoyed it! I spent like a day or two trying to type all of it, then last night I was like "I need a scene introducing Diana's sisters", and latched that part onto the end xD

I'm happy it was well received!

*Noms on cookie*


You should get a pile of cookies. I totally agree with Storybook on this.
 
@Jake Acker , Ok! So if you plan to bump into Alora, should I hold off on responding for a bit? Or do you think I should kind of have Alora wander around in detail a little bit before you introduce Wilhelm to her? At the moment, I just kinda said she was exiting Denver's house and making her way back to her shop.
 
@Jake Acker , Ok! So if you plan to bump into Alora, should I hold off on responding for a bit? Or do you think I should kind of have Alora wander around in detail a little bit before you introduce Wilhelm to her? At the moment, I just kinda said she was exiting Denver's house and making her way back to her shop.
Well that depends honestly, afraid I can't get a post up till tomorrow but if you want to post before then go right ahead :) it might be easier if you do actually, perhaps have Alora get lost down a particularly shady maze of backstreets, somewhere Wilhelm has a real reason to be concerned for her safety?
 
perhaps have Alora get lost down a particularly shady maze of backstreets, somewhere Wilhelm has a real reason to be concerned for her safety?
It's unlikely she gets lost seeing as how she found her way there, and clearly knew the way, however she might be lost in thought and not pay attention to where she's going, or better yet, actually be ushered unto a darker ally by some thugs getting to ready to rob her, or more...
That would give Wilhelm a nice introduction and way to show off some of his prowess, but likely put some fear into poor Alora, so there are some things to consider there.
 
It's unlikely she gets lost seeing as how she found her way there, and clearly knew the way, however she might be lost in thought and not pay attention to where she's going, or better yet, actually be ushered unto a darker ally by some thugs getting to ready to rob her, or more...
That would give Wilhelm a nice introduction and way to show off some of his prowess, but likely put some fear into poor Alora, so there are some things to consider there.
Well I'm happy to go with that plan if Espeon is, it's Alora who is at risk after all so they can decide what route we go down :)
 
Honestly, I would go with the *Suddenly get lost playing pokemon go I mean not paying attention option. However, that's just why opinion. You go with whatever!

Speaking of which, I would like somebody to interact with. Anyone up for it?
 
Honestly, I would go with the *Suddenly get lost playing pokemon go I mean not paying attention option. However, that's just why opinion. You go with whatever!

Speaking of which, I would like somebody to interact with. Anyone up for it?
Can you be more specific? Propose a scene perhaps?
 
Correct me if i'm wrong, but I sort of got the impression that Trini and her 'mother' were still outside of Suimera and looking at it from a distance. Perhaps you should let this particular theft slide and focus on getting your girls into the city first?

I wouldn't be bothered if Trini had stolen it. We might run into a bit of a timeframe issue, though, since that happened a few replies back.Personally, I think Ny might have a point in letting it be for the time being, unless you are SUPER wanting Trini to steal it, then we can figure something out.

I guess you guys are right, I don't know, maybe I'm going to fast. Yeah, I'll head the girls to the city before starting any interaction. By the way, @Sciencewars , if I can make a post before starting anything, our characters could for certainly have an encounter (even though I don't have any ideas right now).
 
Honestly, it depends on the character. I've got a few ideas.
Why don't you share them? Some idea's might apply to multiple characters, or at least give others ideas to implement hooks for you to grab on to. Alternatively you can propose a scene and see if anyone is interested in playing an NPC in said scene, or find a way for their own character to hook into that.

Just asking if anyone is interested in some interactions a bit of a moot point in an RP where everyone joined specifically in the hopes of interacting with each other to build a story and craft a setting.

I guess you guys are right, I don't know, maybe I'm going to fast. Yeah, I'll head the girls to the city before starting any interaction. By the way, @Sciencewars , if I can make a post before starting anything, our characters could for certainly have an encounter (even though I don't have any ideas right now).
Trini is a child, her mother a fortune teller of sorts. Allan is a street wizard. What more do you really need?
 
I guess you guys are right, I don't know, maybe I'm going to fast. Yeah, I'll head the girls to the city before starting any interaction. By the way, @Sciencewars , if I can make a post before starting anything, our characters could for certainly have an encounter (even though I don't have any ideas right now).
Ok! Thanks.

Why don't you share them? Some idea's might apply to multiple characters, or at least give others ideas to implement hooks for you to grab on to. Alternatively you can propose a scene and see if anyone is interested in playing an NPC in said scene, or find a way for their own character to hook into that.

Just asking if anyone is interested in some interactions a bit of a moot point in an RP where everyone joined specifically in the hopes of interacting with each other to build a story and craft a setting.
I understand, sorry.
 
Urban Legends & Common Gossip

There are always many stories told and shared in any bustling society and the Kingdom of Suimera is no different. Guards whisper of shadows in the dark, young boys and old men revel in the legends of ancient heroes, and housewife bicker about the current state of affairs, while young girls gush over court rumors and, pine for royal attention.

Here are a few such stories that everyone in Suimera knows at least something about in one form or another.


The Founding of Suimera
The details of this story were lost in time and the result is that there are many different version. What all the stories have in common however, is that there was a brave Dragonite who traveled far and wide with a group of close companions. Heroes, one story called them, refugees, claimed another. Whichever it was, the friends discovered this paradise high up in the mountains and received Suicune’s blessing to settle there. Some say that the group had to fight and defeat Suicune, others say they had to prove themselves by completing the legend’s numerous tasks and trials, and again others claimed that it had been Suicune who gathered the travelers together for some purpose now forgotten.

The Passing of Suicune
One fact, which all the historic tales about the founding of Suimera agree upon, is that it involved an encounter with Suicune, the Legendary guardian of the vale, who had blessed a Dragonite warrior and marked him as the first of the Delago royal line, and king of Suimera. Since that time, Suicune would make an appearance and bestow its blessing up a new ruler, but only after the previous owner of the mark had passed away. The Passing of Suicune, this event would come to be known and it was always a grand spectacle that usually only happened once every three generations or so, depending on the longevity of the marked ones. The last such passing happened a solid two decades ago, not long after the birth of prince Salem. It had been swift and unexpected, for the young prince’s grandfather, who bore the mark before him, had died well over a decade prior, and many citizens had come to believe the Passing of Suicune to be nothing more than a fairytale. Some people claimed they had seen the legendary guardian that day, while many others claimed that the whole rite was nothing more than a fable concocted by the officials in order to appease the masses. A claim that garnished more and more followers as the years went by and still no one outside the palace had ever seen the prince.

The Story of Queen Celeste
This story is very popular one, particularly with young women and little girls. It tells the classic tale of an ugly and poor, low class citizen, who scrubbed the palace floors for a living. Eventually she evolved into the most beautiful woman in all the lands and captured the heart of Prince Zachary. Being compatible with the prince on a genetic level meant that she was an eligible candidate for holy matrimony, and before long the kingdom had itself a new princess. The old king died and Suicune had not yet marked a successor the royal couple elevated to King and Queen Interim, and continued to rule even after the new King was born and marked until he would be of ruling age. Of course, the storybook princess’ story took a turn for the dramatic when her husband was murdered, turning her story from a fairytale into a tragic epic.

The Royal Assassination
A few short years after the birth of Prince Salem, disaster befell the kingdom of Suimera. There had been an assassination attempt on the life of the infant king, which resulted in the death of acting king Zachery Quintes Delago. The specifics of the assassination have never been brought to light, although testimonies claimed of the involvement of Poison types, Ghost types, and Dark types, which collectively became known as ‘Mistypes’. This event sparked a major uproar which nearly tore the kingdom apart from within. Discrimination and prejudice flared to an all-time high and led to a great social divide. Blessed be Queen Celeste who, despite her grave loss, stepped up to quell the riots and urged her citizens to not give in to fear and hatred. Since then she has made numerous appearances to advocate union and acceptance but it was clear to all who saw her that the queen’s one time brilliance had been subdued. Some blame this on the loss of her lover and the burden of raising a marked child, while others find fault with the Mistypes and claim that the queen is merely putting up a façade for the sake of the people.

The Sheltered Prince
There are plenty of stories going around about the mysterious marked prince of Suimera. From doubts about the existence of a mark in the first place, to theories about the assassination attempt, and the sheltered prince’s appearance, for none outside of the palace really know what young royal looks like. There are prints and paintings of course, but most of those are based on hearsay descriptions, and free running imaginations.

None of these stories seem as popular as the ones about the prince’s mysterious power to control the weather. These tale started not long after the Royal Assassination when the climate of Suimera changed ever so slightly and the weather became strangely unpredictable. As with every story there are alternative theories of course, ranging from the weather being affected by some magical residue of the Assassination, to it reflecting Suicune’s displeasure with the current state of affairs, but the most popular by far is the mystical prince possessing unique abilities. The story theory gained enough traction that particular phrases and sayings become commonplace in daily conversations.

Examples include such saying as; “May the prince smile on us,” when wishing for good weather before setting sail, or “We could use some sympathy from the Prince,” when praying for rain, and “The prince must be throwing a tantrum,” when a storm rages.

The Phantom
An urban legend that has only recently surfaced but quickly gained a lot of traction is that of The Phantom. The rumors of this mysterious being originated in the lower districts some years ago when various reports came in of children finding toys they did not previously own. At first the people were worried about the obvious invasion of their homes but when only toys were added and nothing else stolen, rumors quickly began to spread about the mysterious benefactor of poor children.

At the same time, ever greater and more elaborate heists and thefts were being pulled off in the homes of the wealthy, nobility, and government officials. No private collection remained private for long, and it did not take long for people to link the two phenomenon.

Public opinions are divided, where some claim The Phantom to be a hero, while others brand him a common criminal. So far there have been no clues as to the identity of The Phantom, if it is just one or more people, or if it even is a real person.

One thing is for sure, everyone is always looking forward to hearing of The Phantom’s latest exploits, whether this is because they idolize him, or because they are hoping for new opportunities to apprehend, and unmask the culprit depends on the individual.

The Phantom is keeping the kingdom’s guards on high alert each night, especially during festivals or high valued exhibitions. Meanwhile, many merchants are capitalizing on this legend by selling merchandise dedicated to, or claimed to have been owned by The Phantom.
 
Once Upon a Time in Suimera
by Pokecharms RP
Album

Scene 01 A Kingdom Unveiled at Dawn
Scene 02 Amassing the Armies
Scene 03 Delinquent Town
Scene 04 Down at the Docks
Scene 05 Gathering Harvest & Rushing Mead
Scene 06 Out Onto the Lake
Scene 07 The Merchant District
Scene 08 The Streets After Dark
Scene 09 Welcome to Suimera's Main Street
Scene 10 When Thieves Take the Streets

Character 01 Ajani Robyn
Character 02 Allen Puck
Character 03 Alora Shimmings
Character 04 Cassandra De L'allée
Character 05 Diana
Character 06 Gerald Des Appoint
Character 07 Mai-Ling
Character 08 Opel Fay
Character 09 Que Allein
Character 10 Salem Tempus Delago
Character 11 Trini Shaw
Character 12 Wilhelm Greystone

First Draft; more songs may be added, and songs already presented may be subject to change.
Note; here is a small glimpse of what goes on in my head whenever I read any of your entries. This is purely for entertainment value, nothing more, nothing less.

These songs are not composed nor performed by me. Much greater minds with loads more talent are behind these themes. I merely fit them to my perception of things.
 
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I just spent a rather large amount of time listening to almost all of those tunes and I have to say well chosen Nygenn, I couldn't help but laugh when I first heard the one for Allen and then Wilhelm's, they were both rather funky when compared to the others XD
 
@Nygenn I have to say that soundrack you made for the RP is fantastic, due to lack of time I wasn't able to listen to them comppletely, but I heard fragments of each one and they are so accurate (specially Alora's one, that was my personal favorite). About Trini's, I really enjoyed the fact that I could feel it related to her relationship to her mother somehow.
 
I was going to talk about possible concerns of Que's isolation, but I'm falling short of words, so if you have any... too bad?

Otherwise, I wanted to state that I'm really not happy with the sort of jumbled tone of my post and was wondering whether anyone else felt it as well, as I know I can become very biased. In addition, I keep desperately wanting to add in something of the story of the city's founding, and the idea was originally that he was collecting books so as to compare the small tidbits they had and decide which one he thought was true- an idea I really wanted to use to show some character through his decision. Unfortunately, I can't seem to fit it in, so I'm throwing it out there because I wanted to share it anyways :p

The music is fun, although I've always imagined Que with more of a polyphonic texture- then again, I'm basically obsessed with classical, orchestral pieces, so I'll always imagine it more in that light. It does fit very well, especially the beginning, and it's nice to have an auditory aid of how I've portrayed him thus far :)

Edit; Just listened through all of them, allow me to freak out about scene number 8. That is one awesome piece of music, and it fits the idea so well. And it's just an awesome piece of music, how it rises and falls, the deadened crash of the ending... I can't get over it XD And the slides on that last scene are killing me. Ahhahah, I've never been able to play them that perfectly, ahaha, it gives me the chills.

I need to listen to more kinds of music XD
 
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